Shyness.
It's probably not the first thing that comes to mind when thinking about stressors, but shyness can be very stressful indeed. While it is probably not unusual to feel slightly uncomfortable in a new social setting, chronic shyness can lead to anxiety, depressive symptoms, and interpersonal problems (Rubin, Coplan, & Bowker, 2009).
A dear friend - let's call her Samantha - is very shy indeed. She is married to a muso, and so is often out in the public arena with him, either attending one of his performances (and the inevitable after party) or some of his muso friends' performances (and the inevitable after parties!).
Early on in her relationship, Samantha would beg a friend to attend events with her so that she would have someone to talk to. And then she hit upon an idea.
Samantha gave herself a role, that of (unpaid) promoter. She would do whatever research was necessary prior to a concert, then flit from group to group at the after party, never staying too long, and weaving her promo material into the conversation.
Her husband's friends think she's fabulous as she's always raving about their latest review or next big event, her husband loves her more than ever (aww) and Samantha herself is happy in situations that she previously described as torture.
Are you shy, or do you know someone who is? Do you have any tips as to how to cope with shyness? Love to hear your thoughts!
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